In "When Elephants Weep," Jeffrey Moussaieff Masson speculates and gives considerable evidence (both scientific and anecdotal) for the emotional life of individual animals and communities of animals, citing examples from insects to pachyderms. Much of the book is spent describing the emotional life of monkeys and other primates.
I think it's a fascinating read. It reminds me that for all we know about creation, there is yet so much to discover; and many of our discoveries bring about a reevaluation of the assumptions we inherited.
For example, there is a section on "Shame, Blushing and Hidden Secrets," where this sentence just blurts out: "Shame is one of the most vividly remembered feelings." When I saw that, a kind of shock wave went through me. This is absolutely true. The author goes on to say that other emotions, some even thought to be more intense than shame (anger, for example) are remembered with less intensity than shame. We remember that we were angry, but the actual intensity of that anger has likely subsided. Since this book is about the emotional life of animals (subtext: humans are very creaturely) he spends some time in the discovery process, poking holes in the assumption that the rest of the animal kingdom is basically devoid of emotion. The claim that animals are devoid of emotion gives humankind license to conduct experiments, hunt, proclaim superiority, etc.
Of course I am a human, reading a book written by a human on non-human emotional processes, and part of the "hook" is to realize the intensities and involuntary emotional reactivity that I experience inside my own self.
So on this topic of shame and memory, I immediately thought of the culture of my upbringing and the dominant culture of the world around me. Through no fault of their own except passive acceptance, my forebears utilized shame both in parenting within family groups and in the ordering of society. In fact I suppose it can be argued that the threat of shame is what provides the foundation for a law-abiding society. Parenthetically, when I was recently pulled over for speeding, I felt shame in several ways: 1) the lights of the patrol car, 2) the presence of the officer standing over me, 3) being with about forty others and taking my turn standing in front of the judge at Justice Court, 4) telling my wife. 5) telling my kids. Some people may not attach shame to that simple experience, but I certainly did. And I suspect that those in authority would hope for some amount of shame in the perpetrator.
Now as a theologian, I wonder about shame in terms of our experience in Christian spirituality. How important is it for systematic theology? The Lutheran doctrine of Law and Gospel is a way to describe the bondage we have as sinners under the wrath of God, and then the freedom we receive through the death and resurrection of Christ. It seems to me that shame is part of the picture here. My human experience of shame in the midst of family and society is quite negative, where there is judgment and very little mercy. In fact I consider that shame has been used in my life as a way to manipulate me into a particular moral code, a code that in the end happens to be well and good, but the path to get there is more than a little rough. Isn't there a different way to grow into a particular walk of life, especially when speaking about the Christian's relationship with Jesus Christ and the world around them?
The more difficult way to approach this topic is to examine the ways I covertly and unconsciously apply shaming techniques in my ministry and in my parenting. Whenever I am in a position of authority, the authority figures of my past are the ones whose influence almost dictates my very state of mind. My goodness, this is a question I'll have to be considering very deeply for quite some time. Especially, if I would rather not use shaming as a technique, what else should I take up as a paradigm?
